power to the people (we don't want it, we want pleasure)

You can see I have stooped so low that I now have weird blog post titles.

I'M GOING TO DO MY EYES IN BRIGHT PURPLE FOR FAM. Damn, I wish I knew a make up artist. And a political philosopher. And someone who can tell me something new about quantum indeterminacy. I COULD DO WITH SOME HELP. For FAM, my Humanities Scholarship essay and my determinism dialogue.

I don't know how I'm going to carry... 40kg of t-shirts from the classroom to the pavilion all alone tomorrow. I have to do it all in one go, because I have no one to watch over the shirts at the pavilion. EEK

This made me happy:
A song

And some things are so depressing:
Doing research for my HP application essay makes me want to puke. Literally. I can't believe how hateful and disgusting ordinary people can be.

i am sixteen going on seventeen and i've been singing this song since i was six

I don't think I cried because I won't get to see all of you lovely people again. I will. We're going to the same junior college anyway. I cried because now I have to be grown up.

DDDDDDDDDDDDD:

In ten years I'll be 26, in twenty I'll be 36, in forty I'll be 56 DECADES PASS SO QUICKLY I was just six a moment ago on the first day of primary school

I bought this really spicy sandwich from a canteen stall and my dad was watching me (because they let parents stay on the first day) and when I ate it I cried and he laughed. I don't remember at all the feeling of being small and so skinny and new and stupid, help me, I can't ever get that back! And in ten years I won't remember the feeling of being young and scruffy with my school uniform stuck to my back, even though I remember the words to describe it. The words are not the feeling.

HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING I WANT MY CHILDHOOD BACK.

that's all, folks!

Chinatown, graduation + party:

Look, look, I mean, listen, a match made in heaven:

Barack Obama's amazingly consistent smile from Eric Spiegelman on Vimeo.

I watched Annie Hall last night! Now I know the context of that famous line about the metaphysics exam. LOL.

I had a fit of extreme ditsiness 19 hours ago brought on by a mention of Breakfast at Tiffany's. I FAIL AT ACTING MY AGE

OH WELL AT LEAST THE DAMN ARCHITECTURAL MODEL IS DONE, HMM?

a lost conversation is what happens when you tell someone something on fb and right before you press enter, before they even know you're talking to them they go offline DO YOU WANT TO SEND THIS AS A PRIVATE MESSAGE? of course not.

Today was quite ok, no? I mean, I watched the Matrix again in the morning at the library. And had a horrible stomachache. I SPENT TWO WHOLE HOURS AT THE PAVILION MAKING MY STUPID MODEL. I wanted to die afterwards because I felt like puking/like my head was going to explode but anyway I ate paracetamol and chocolates for lunch, which made me feel slightly better. After architecture I went for the Shell Dialogue, which was pretty fun (mostly because I had a pretty fun neighbour/seatmate/whatever it is you call the person who sits with you).

Why am I telling you all this? Who the hell are you??? Ok I know you read my blog Richard but aside from you and the occasional Nana it's pretty funny how complete strangers can hypothetically know creepy things about me. (No, it's not pretty funny, it's something else, my vocabulary bank is strangely drained tonight)

But then again what kind of idiot puts anything on her blog that she doesn't want the whole world to see? Of course I want you to know what I ate for lunch. Or I don't care.

I think I'm just grieving over that lost conversation. I'll get over it.

*CAUSE I'M A SHOO SHOO SHOO A SHOO SHOO SHOO A SHOO SHOO SHOO SHOO SUGARRRRTOWN*

1. I’ve come to realize that my hair:
is longer than I think


2. I’ve come to realize that when I talk:
Sarah thinks I sound like I'm singing


4. I’ve come to realize that all I really need:
is ice cream for lunch every day


5. I’ve come to realize that I’ve lost:
a lot of time

6. I’ve come to realize that I hate it when:
nothing happens



7. I’ve come to realize that if I’m drunk:
I am drunk. I am also not drunk (pretend this is true). Either I am drunk or my brother is a girl. Since I am not drunk, my brother is a girl!

VOILA MR H I DID UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT IN THE MORNING

I've never actually been really drunk before but I have been really absurd in the past.


8. I’ve come to realize that money:
is nice


9. I’ve come to realize that when I get old:
I might not run down streets naked after all


10. I’ve come to realize that I’ll always be:
something


11. I’ve come to realize that I have a crush on:
many peoople

12. I’ve come to realize that the last time I cried was:
while I was reading the National Geographic just now

13. I’ve come to realize that my cell phone:
is something

14. I’ve come to realize that when I wake up in the morning:
I experience a brief moment of life without a fear of the dark

15. I’ve come to realize that before I go to sleep at night I:
pretend to sleep

16. I’ve come to realize that right now I am thinking about:
cakes

17. I’ve come to realize that my life:
is something

18. I’ve come to realize that my favourite drink is:
tea

19. I’ve come to realize that today I will:
cut some compressed foam

20. I’ve come to realize that tonight I will:
cut more compressed foam

21. I’ve come to realize that tomorrow I will:
cut some sheets of acrylic

22. I’ve come to realize that I really want to:
stay in secondary school

23. I’ve come to realize that the person who is most likely to repost this is:
myself

24. I’ve come to realize relationships are:
relative? IDK what to put here

25. I’ve come to realize that love:
makes some people want to die in/under buses

26. I’ve come to realize food is:
not really necessary if you go to the library a lot

27: I’ve come to realize that this holiday:
?

28. I’ve come to realize heartbreak is:
heartbreaking

29.I’ve come to realize that my sister(s):
isn't real. Oh my god.

30. I’ve come to realize that crying:
makes me feel important

31. I’ve come to realize that death:
is mysterious

32. I’ve come to realize that if I’m sick:
I have long conversations with people. It's as if my body wants other people to GET SICK TOO.

33. I’ve come to realize when I’m bored:
I walk rounds around the school, up and down the steps to the library, to and from the class trays and through the canteen

darling your ideologies were attacking each other

Karen's play was so cute... but right now the only things I can feel are a vague panic rising at the back of my head, and my stomach growling.

thomas nagel's hot fudge sundae diet actually works

That's how I lost 2kg after the exams while eating only Dairy Queen blizzards and jellies for lunch.

Hey, look! Entertainment for people with colds:

This is Japan! from Eric Testroete on Vimeo.

I really miss Tokyo

sick

Oh, nice. I somehow managed to be marked 'present' for school today without actually doing anything useful. I sat around during PE, finished the Fear of Knowledge book while sniffling away/whining at Cheryl, had nothing for breakfast, returned the book to Mr H (who is going to catch my cold, as is Talia), tried to have a tea party with him and Talia (failed, because school tea is bad and at any rate 10 o'clock is the wrong time of the day), ended up having a really long foodless conversation with them instead, went late for geography, moped around, went to the school sick bay, half-slept for forty minutes without any clue at all as to how much time had passed in the outside world, got out, ate two cups of jelly, highlighted two sentences in the essay about hard incompatibilism that I'm supposed to READ AND UNDERSTAND AND TURN INTO A DIALOGUE BY WEDNESDAY and then WENT HOME.

Hehe. My Art Chem teacher HATES me.

Oh my god, it's due on Wednesday. The determinism dialogue.
PHEW.
My dad's gramophone was brought home today. It's very loud... hehe the record we keep playing is George Formby's 'Letting the New Year In', even though it's not even November yet (oh shit, it will be, soon).
I spent half an hour in the afternoon struggling with the photocopying machine at the national library. How stupid is that??? HOW STUPID IS THAT

I found him at the far end of the school carpark on Thursday.

A lost man

Honestly, I love this city.

'I have improved on Kant's paragraphing'

OH MY GOD LOLLLLLL
SHIT I SUCK AT TIME MANAGEMENT DON'T I

how you eef

Like this. (LOL, WTF??? I found it on wikipedia. The internet is full of strange things.)

OK NOW CONCENTRATE ON THE DETERMINISM DIALOGUE TOTALLY DUE ON MONDAY

A few months ago a football team from the DPRK came to Singapore for the Asian Youth Games; I remember the Straits Times was really fascinated with them. SO WAS I. I've never really been in such a different world before. All my life I've lived in comfortable high-tech democracies (to a certain degree).

Oh my god. I'll be 16 in four hours.

I have a hilarious/frightening recurring day-mare

In which I'm sitting in a car arguing about some rubbish with the driver who has a knife in his pocket and then ONE OF US STABS THE OTHER.

While trying to build an architectural model:
Rebekah: First you want to steal a car, now you want to snap people. Kids these days...

During Dinner:
Dad: I watched that episode fifty years ago, before you were born.
Me: Fifty years ago was before you were born!
Dad: Welcome to the Twilight Zone.
Brother: TINGTINGTINGTINGTINGTINGTINGTING *theme song*


We're such freaks!!!

Listen to this!!! MY BROTHER IS TOO CUTE/WEIRD

1a. I got a 3.6 for my Chemistry exam.

OR

1b. I dreamt that I got a 3.6 for my Chemistry exam.


THIS IS SOME SICK JOKE

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

5 o'clock sun

facebook gave me pandas on youtube

Watch this (and cry).

Bamboozling Ourselves, a very cool blog I came across/half-looked for - about the whole Han van Meegeren fiasco at the end of WW2. Ok, I shall not attempt to volunteer a commentary - I always end up sounding awkward/offering a gruesome fact. I hope I turn out to be some brilliant loser in the end... one of those children who lie around staring at flies and thinking all day and eventually spitting out some revolutionary idea. HMMM.

I have a feeling this picture is TOO BIG. Blogger is being uncooperative today.

Steve Mann's Please Wait, which I came across in Mr H's art notes - it bothers me/intrigues me immensely/I am obsessed with it because it reminds me of this disturbing game my mother used to play when I was three or four:

Mum: Where are you, Jing Xuan?
Me: Here!
Mum: Where? Has anyone seen my daughter?
Me: Heheh. I'm here.
Mum: Where?
Me: Heeeeere.
Mum: Oh dear, she's missing!

...On and on and on until I started to panic/suffer an existential crisis (shit I've been using so many strokes, it can't be good for my grammar) and started shrieking/dancing without clothes on, at which point my mother would stop. Actually, I don't remember the dancing. Aside from this I had/have a perfectly normal and healthy relationship with my mother.

yes my dear (i can see in 3D)

Ryan Fitzgerald

Today: reasonably more exciting; reinvented Bette Davis Eyes with Sarah (I'm gonna write Bette Davis Eye, about a Greek girl and her favourite cyclops. Or maybe it'll be about some disease. Like, you know pink/red eye), crashed a philosophy class, had a nice conversation involving liquefying corpses and the invention of the grid, heard a river-side restaurant play abovementioned song (I nearly laughed out loud) while walking away from a dodgy place, accidentally painted streaks of white on my school uniform...

:)

ennui

from here

from here



My school life is so remarkably boring now. I don't know why! Before the exams I'd planned out so many fun things to do in Term 4, and I have enormous stretches of free time now, but I DON'T FEEL LIKE DOING ANYTHING. To make matters worse I have been feeling lousily restless and lonely - I haven't really spoken to anyone (except Brenda today, a totally inane/insane conversation, haha) and I haven't had a real recess for so long; I pace around the school (today I went on an hour-long walk to and from Orchard Road, and before that took several thousand turns about the school grounds).

This is basically my brain right now.

Also, who borrowed the latest issue of Monocle from the school library? HMMMM It's been gone for So. Many. Days
>.> *pointed (but actually aimless) glare*

I watched Lost in Translation yesterday! I know, I'm six years late - but, hey, I was nine when it came out, hardly a suitable age for being interested in films about mid-life crises and philosophy students (and fifteen is??? HAHA).

I think Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray are beautiful together. I love the soundtrack. I love how the muted colour palette of Charlotte's hotel room scenes is so stifling and frustrating. It's a very pretty film...

But I can't help realising (looking from the other side of those huge hotel-room windows, as a native of an 'Asian city', if generalisations can be made like this) that Bob and Charlotte are precisely the kind of tourists I'd hate, if I met them on the MRT. I also realise that their behaviour somewhat resembles my own embarassing behaviour when I lived in Tokyo - I used to speak really loudly in English on school trips to museums, and my friends and I would yell strange things ('cholesterol!' 'I love Tom Cruise!') to each other/the local kids on the street. Oh my.

Back and forth
I must admit the second link is a lot more convincing in its argument... Well, perhaps it's true that Coppola was really trying to show Tokyo through the eyes of her two main characters - the film annoys only because they're annoying... but it hardly makes sense for a director to deliberately give her protagonists such unappealing arrogance.

HMMM

1. I've never heard my dad speak French before today. It is so strange. I found a French-Japanese dictionary at home one day and today while watching the Mid-Autumn Festival show on CCTV (somehow I have managed to involve three different countries in one sentence) I was suddenly compelled to ask him if he has ever studied French before - HE HAS. THIS IS WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD.

2. On a trip to the Design and Environment Faculty of NUS yesterday I met and fell in love with a 3D PRINTER.

Sigh. They have laser engravers and giant printers too

3. Netball Carnival!

It's all fun and games until someone gets their head stuck in a 3600-year-old Sumerian pot.
Kafka at Camp: The Lost Diaries

LOL.

Spent the whole afternoon grinding pigments/boiling starch/trying to clean linseed oil off glass funnels (MAKING PAINT during my art chem class) and now I will never be able to find GWAPE romantic or thrilling again. Haha.